I have no idea what I’m doing with my life.
Am I loosing interest in becoming a veterinarian? If so, what the fuck do I do with my life now? I spent 20+ years trying to get here, trying to achieve this career/life goal…but now I’m not so sure if I want this anymore. The stress & anxiety of the program is killing me.
All that I know is this: I want to do good & change the world with the talents & skills that I have to offer. But how?! SON OF A BITCH, HOW DO I DO THIS?!?!
Uncertainty is the worst.
5 hours later, I’ve finally got my Pathology notes organized. Thanks, OCD!
Each unit is about 1inch - 3 inches thick & full of color codes to help guide me through this homework assignment. Hurray!
Types of Skin Lesions
(Medical Terminology- An Illustrated Guide)
Coronary artery bypass graft (CABG)
I would love to do this. However, my hands shake like a goddamn leaf due to anxiety &/or just living/breathing, so it’s prolly not gonna happen.
It’s gotten to the point where I gotta ask myself this question - Which do I want more: An enjoyable social life or passing vet school?
Goddamnit. You win again, vet school.
And so it goes. I’m packing up my school shit & heading toward the quietest room, prolly without a window. I’ll be setting up my ‘study shop’ until further notice.
But first I’m gonna take a nap.
This is one of the first comics that I read during my 1st semester of veterinary school. I still have the original copy that I tore outta the school newspaper & I have it posted in my bedroom.
At the time, I thought it was a funny how the context/punch line could be related to veterinary school. Like, “Oh! Teehee! Vet school is kinda like that…death or something. Plus, the cat is the grim reaper. Oh, haha HAH!”
However, now I’m realizing it’s not a funny joke. IT’S THE GODDAMN TRUTH! THE GODDAMN FUCKING TRUUUUUUTH!
Today, I had the first exam of the semester.
However, this weekend I done fuck’d up & did too much socializing/partying/sleeping instead of the needed studying.
I think I barely passed the exam, but I’ve learned my lesson. From now on, it’s more work & less play if I want to pass this semester and be able to continue on my academic path of becoming a veterinarian.
In summary: From now on, taking an exam should feel like this:
And less like this:
Spent the majority of my Friday night here, instead of studying (like I should have done).
It’s cew. Whatevah.
*Door opens at the room I’m studying in at the Student Center*
Al (the janitor): You’re STILL here?!
Me: *Sigh* Yup.
Al: I should have known it was you in here. Well, go on, gurl. Do what you do. It’s almost 1am, so I’m out. Have a good night!
Thanks, Al! You’re the best!
This week’s task is to organize my school notes & ‘office area’, whatever the fuck that is. I have a 2 drawer filing cabinet…but I think I may need more drawers in order to file all my fucking lecture notes.
Anyways, I plan on ‘upgrading’ my current & future cabinet kinda like this. And then I’ll start organizing.